Imagine you could learn a new language of about 40-50 words. You could only master 10-15 of these but even these 10-15 words would help you communicate much more effectively with people speaking various other languages. These 10 or 15 words would, ultimately, help you be more successful in your professional or personal life.
Experts have been saying for decades that in order to change a person you need to look at the underlying habits, values and beliefs that make the foundation of their behaviors and you need to change those first before you change the person.
I believe this to be true, and many examples prove me — and others — right.
But what if you don’t want to change the person? What if you just want to know how to communicate with them better? Or you want to know if they match a certain role in an organization and your expectations of them?
What if there were a set of very simple principles that allowed you to communicate more effectively, to engage and motivate people, and to bring about change? What if you could learn these fast, like a language of 40 words? This is what neuro-linguistic programming can let you do.
The reason neuro-linguistic programming, or NLP, rocked the world of psychology and was initially rejected, was that its authors were not psychologists. Yet they studied what psychologists did, and looked at their work from a system programming and linguistic perspective rather than a pathological one.
They were rejected because they could bring about change without labeling traits and behaviors as pathological and working from there to fix the pathology. And they could train others in just a matter of weeks to do the same.
Don’t get me wrong, I strongly believe in psychology as the foundation that made all this possible. However, we need something that any one of us can quickly learn to use in everyday life and get results with healthy people.
NLP does not aim to replace psychologists and therapists: they do stellar work in addressing mental health problems. They help people who need psychological help.
We help people who may need another kind of help. The principles we apply and the ones we teach are based on recognizing that behavior is fundamentally a series of habits that have been practiced enough times to become automatic, unconscious responses.
Individual behaviors can be observed, documented and graphed, so that others can identify them, relate to them, and engage them appropriately, increasing the likelihood of successful change.
We can train people to replace their old familiar behaviors with new ones. By encouraging you to practice these new behaviors enough times, we can help you bring about a perceptible change. We may even be able to shift values and beliefs.
Here’s what I mean: values and beliefs come from testing a certain behavior and receiving feedback. If you receive the same feedback to the same behavior consistently, you build a belief that you make the basis for a value.
So, if I am hungry and I see some food in a store, steal it and don’t get caught, I might believe myself to be a good thief. If I continue stealing and not getting caught I may eventually come to value my thieving skills and become proud of them. I will then keep looking for ways to reinforce that pride, and will eventually be labelled a thief.
What if someone could teach me that for a small amount of effort I could earn a few bucks and buy food much more easily and with far less risks and stress? Given enough time and consistent practice, the new behavior will either suppress or completely replace the old one.
Here is what happens: we don’t change the motivation for the old behavior, which was hunger. We just identify the behavior, and give the person demonstrating it a new option, a new behavior. Then we let them practise it until it turned into an unconscious response.
Identifying and analysing behaviors instead of ticking off personality label boxes provides you with insight into the way different people approach tasks, the way they react to changes, and the way they deal with challenges.
This insight helps you see the world from their perspective and get a much better understanding that then enables you to approach them and motivate them much more effectively than you would otherwise.
Founder – NAGUI BIHELEK
Nagui has been a business entrepreneur and innovator since his teens.
○ Multiple start ups from Import and Distribution to Property development.
○ Innovations in Wireless Communication, VOIP, Automotive controls, and more.
○ Recent startups include The Original Turducken, Accudemics, and AccuMatch.
Having always had an interest in psychology and human factor engineering, and despite the engineering background found his way back to the world of psychology and neurology due to recent ventures in Business Coaching and Recruiting. The desire to solve the biggest recruiting challenge getting the right people in the right role and keeping them motivated, led to the development of AccuMatch.
In his studies of NLP and Coaching he was fortunate enough to study with some of the early founders of NLP and Meta-Programs. It is through the decade of studies and research in this field that he came to develop AccuMatch systems that we have today.
Nagui believes that educating oneself is a constant endeavor. We need to be constantly nurturing ourselves through knowledge. This is what keeps us evolving and growing on many levels.
A usually private family man, married 28 years, with two adult children following in similar footsteps.